Ingenuidad -  Maia

Ingenuidad pensabas de mí
Cuando todo, todo te di
Ingenuidad es porque te creí
Lo que quisiste yo fui
Fui tu cura, fui tu remedio
Como una pluma en el viento
Flotaba según tu aliento
Según tu respiración
Daba mi vida por ti
Y eso me hacia feliz
Porque todo lo que te daba
Era verdadero amor

Coro:
Ingenuidad no era  que yo creyera todo aquello que hiciste y dijiste
Ingenuidad era que tú mintieras tanto porque a la vuelta perdiste
Ingenuidad no era que yo te amara y que te diera mi vida sin medidas
Ingenuidad era que tú pensaras que con falsas promesas me quedaría

Sin preguntas todo te di
Cada beso fue para ti
No había duda en mi pensamiento
Contigo iría hasta el fin
Mi cariño fue tan sincero
Que me creí todo el juego
Y de eso no me arrepiento
Mi corazón es así
Pero tú cambiaste las cosas
Se marchitaron las rosas
Dejaste ver el engaño
Y ahora lloras por mí

Coro:
Ingenuidad no era  que yo creyera todo aquello que hiciste y dijiste
Ingenuidad era que tú mintieras tanto porque a la vuelta perdiste
Ingenuidad no era que yo te amara y que te diera mi vida sin medidas
Ingenuidad era que tú pensaras que con falsas promesas me quedaría

Te di mis manos como un niño
Que simplemente da cariño
Yo te entregue mis deseos,
Mis sueños y hasta mis miedos
Haber creído que me amabas
No fue tan cruel como pensaba
Ingenuidad fue mentirme
Pues tu crueldad te castiga
Ya nunca más regresare

Yo solo daba la verdad
Y tú mentiras
Toda mi vida te entregue
Y no supiste para que
Siempre cumplí lo que jure
Tú no cumplías
Ingenuidad no fue creer
Tu engaño fue la ingenuidad

so

quite a week.

i worked hard on the last week and the weekend.

past friday i had a virtual party with my friend from venezuela. he introduced me to his friends and through webcam and skype we spent a wonderful friday night playing pictionary :D :D

on monday i saw my dear stalker, we walked through the rain under a tiny umbrella. he was kinda absent because he had an argument with his girlfriend, but i guess he’s ok right now.

today, wow what a day!!
i woke up pretty early in the morning and visited my MS boss, met his wife (a LOVELY woman) and their pretty cats. we went to a university to work on an event. pretty pretty cool, worked my ass off. and i was told about the possible-maybe-who-knows work travel to Brazil… i really wanna go. it’s sounds amazing.

at night talked with dear stalker and had a nice time. only bad thing was that H appeared, and he’s kinda upset about readng my blog and getting to know that … well you know, if you read this… so… he’s been quite in pain and sad, and saying so many things to me through messenger.

i tried to be neutral, but he wanted me to talk so a talked. and i told him what i think. it’s sad to learn that he now knows the worth of this little human being. and this had to happen to realize that.

was pretty sad.  but i’m ok, life goes on, and no one is going to stop because of me. and it’s too late for anything else. it’s too late to go back to H and to what we were… because i kind of see new things in me. i see i’m worth a little tiny bit more. and i see i’m pretty -not a fashion model, not even beautiful… just pretty-, i see there’s so many guys and girls out there, that may wanna share a dream with me, and SO worth the time and the love.

i’m living this things that i missed so much, like romance. like a GUY -yeah, a male- being sweet and caring and having the brain and the time to think about something special. -i know, incredible-
i feel kinda grown up, seeing myself stand in a meeting and talk, and talk and feel so confident, and being recognized by what i am; a woman, with a career, pretty, and smart -a little :P- and i feel great.

yeah now i see that somehow i felt so little with H. he’s so huge and i was so amazed by his talent and his brain, that i felt so little, such a poor thing, such a worthless thing. and maybe it’s just because of my screwed brain. but now i feel a possible truth and is that, maybe it was a little about him - he never found a way to made me feel special

and it’s pathetic, cuz i’ve met amazing people that manage to make me feel special with a couple of words, a look, even a fucking stupid emoticon. but he never did. why?
right now the first thing that comes to my mind is : he never did the effort. he never tried. ok, i know he’s not a romantic kind, but hell, he never even tried. i wasn’t worth the try.

then i got for example dear stalker, that he tries to talk and use words he hates and never use, just to see me laugh - and the hell that i feel so sweet inside when he does!!

so that’s it. pretty sad you realise the worth in something you loose.
at least i think i knew what i was loosing when i broke with H, and took the desition myself. not letting destiny or someone else do it for me.

… just for the right to decide your future, and dream…