friday night

everyone is having a party time tonight.. and i’m at bed.

I had plans, but got sick and had to cancel them. but i’m not sick enough not to feel bored at being here alone. i want to have a nice company. is that too much to ask?

i mean, i’ve been alone for like a month? i’m starting to feel ready to get up and go out, meet people, have stuff to do.

I love my sedentary life, but i’d love to have plans from time to time. also is the best way to take my mind off some toughts that i’m not happy with. you know, this obsession… i need anything but being rejected anymore.

 

i’ve been to hooked up with Fiona Apple, every single song means something to me, to my life, to my soul. i love it absolutely.

 

my throat hurts and i can’t sing that well, but i still try, i need it.

 

i look around and i found all this friends i’ve got, with no faces, only words… but i already love them somehow.

 

love love love love love feel feel feel feel feel feel pain pain pain pain pain care care care care love love love love love touch touch touch kiss kiss love.

 

i wanna feel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is that too much to ask?

i want to make feel, i want to stop feeling what is not here to touch, i wanna be loved and THEN love back, not fall in love silly like i usually do.

 

i want someone to love me. please love me?