i had a dream. a dream of you and me together.

i was dressed in white, the wind made my hair move in circles… just like my dress did around my legs. i was wasling trough green grass, soft in my naked feet. i fetl happy, i felt safe.

i walked though it not knowing where i was going, but certain that i was getting somewhere. i had flowers in my head and in my hands. white jazmin. our favourite.

i walked slowly just admiring the feeling and the green, and then i see a little boy in the horizon, runnig towards me, he’s in a little black tuxedo, his hair is dark brown, short. his eyes are deep and green. he has a pettit perfect nose and tight lips… he runs with his arms wide open and a smile on his face. when we find each other we hug. and then i feel you hugging me through him. It’s our son.

a perfect mix between you and me, and your sweet with my joy, all you strenght with my weakness… he’s wonderful, and he’s hugging me while he says ‘It’s time mom’

and he pulls me away and takes my hand with his little soft hand, and pulls me untill i walk to where he wants me to go. he’s smiling, he’s always smiling, just like we do, when we’re together.

and we walk through the green, the wind in our faces, moving our hair and clothes. soothing us with its chant. a sweet chant.

and then again i see in the horizon a shrine, and a handsome man wearing a white dress. he’s tall and has short hair. deep eyes and tight lips. he has his hands on his pockets and it’s smiling at the little one that pulls me to get faster to him… it’s you.

You wait for me while i slowly get there, when i’m closer i can smell you, and i’m home. you keep smiling, sweet smile that makes me feel whole. when we’re close, the little one takes your hand and pulls us both together closer to the shrine. it’s our wedding.

little one give us our rings, and we exchange lovely silver rings with our names.your hands tremble and your eyes are bright, and so my hands are shaking too and i feel so touched i want to cry. but your hands are warm and hold mine tightly until we both stop shaking cuz we see on each other what we want to see everyday in our lifes… our love… and little one is smiling now letting little giggles out cuz he knows it’s a special day for mom and dad. it’s our wedding

we kiss in the down, sorrounded by nothing but green grass and deep love. we’re home.

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pain, is all i can put in words when i feel my knees give in making me fall on the bathroom floor.

blood. is all i can see under me, being washed away by the water in the shower.

I scream your name.

I hope someone hears me.

I scream your name again.

Our dream is being washed away in the shower, little one is being washed away.