it’s becoming a runaway… not my real intention. i just wanna try writing whatever here to let this thing out… whatever it is… it’s like if you were a writer and you find the first thing on earth you can’t describe with words… it’s like if you were a painter and you find something so beautiful and perfect you can’t paint… it’s like being stuck with a feeling in your throat and finding yourself trying to spit it before it suffocates you…. can anybody understand this?